Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
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