You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
