hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
