Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
