so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
