i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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