I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
