the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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