Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
