I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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