Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
