what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
