Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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