I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
