How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
