We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Sorry my hands just texted you
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
