Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
