pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
