I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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