It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize