What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
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