at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
