Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She bit a glass in half.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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