And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize