Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
