Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
