i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
