he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
