lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
