guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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