But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
