They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize