I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
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