My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
