she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize