I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
