Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize