"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
