So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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