I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Do vagina's smell?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
