What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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