I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
He better not be in your backpack
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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