on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
