I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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