Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
