tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
