yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
