Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
