just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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