atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Randomize