how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I'm having to shit out rocks
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
