kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
